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How To Look Cool After Being Locked Out of Your Apartment!

My keys!

I’m writing this article about being locked out of my apartment because right now I’m locked out of my apartment. I’m sitting on a bench. In Brooklyn. With my laptop. It’s my version of an urban home office. Before you start feeling really too bad for me, I'm kidding. Not about being locked out, but I'm at my friend's apartment. She was kind enough to take me in.

All I want is to be in my office/closet room blasting loud music and writing like I do every other night. But that just isn’t going to happen. Instead I’ll write this story from NOT my home. And I won’t listen to any loud music at all because my friend is asleep like any normal person should be at 2 AM. It’s not so bad. My greatest concern is this: how will I dress really cool for tomorrow when I'm locked out?!?!

I consulted a genius friend that had some particularly useful advice. Even for a boy:

"You buy a quadruple XL tee from a 24 hour store. Belt it. Then you go to your friends house ‪and borrow her exercise ball and you cut it in half. Make holes in it. Make them shorts." (Maybe this was funnier at 2 AM?)

Or perhaps I was so entertained by this because it involves an image of myself cutting a “fitness ball” in half or maybe it's because the thought of me successfully accomplishing any sort of DIY project is hilarious. PS I made nothing! (Shoutout to my homegirl Erica Domesek of PS - I Made This, AKA the young Martha Stewart. Maybe you can give me a lesson some time?)

But what I really did was just suck it up and borrow a pair of socks and undwear from my friend. And shamefully worse, I threw on the same dirty t-shirt that I wore yesterday. What else is there to do, really? And who says you have to wear something different EVERY single day? Thanks for letting me air my dirty laundry, as always.

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