Beach Towels for the One Percent
Along with a Ralph Lauren picnic basket and a mammoth Louis Vuitton trunk, I want a completely unnecessary-yet-amazing beach towel.
I'd never buy any of those things myself since my friends would call me out for not being either Madonna en route to a Scottish castle, or Leo on a yacht in St. Tropez, but I'd definitely want someone to give one of them me— especially the beach towels.
As far as fashion-y splurges go, they'd last way longer; unlike Carrie Bradshaw-esque stilettos that wear down to the metal after four wears or beaded dresses forced to hang in garment bags every minute, spendy beach towels are indestructible by definition. So in that one way, they're practical. Though, of course, their real power is making you look like you're about to film an episode of MTV's Cribs the second you leave the beach or the pool.
That's the message all of the towels in the slideshow below deliver, no matter how different they look. Click through to shop them all, but don't be surprised when you come back from a swim to find your iPhone and wallet lying on the patch of sand where your towel used to be.
No one has to know you've never even been to California.
Wrap it around your waist and clip it at the side, and you'll have a more affordable version of their Aztec-printed kilt skirts.
I'd wager serious money that Lindsay Lohan owns at least two of these.
Can't feel bad about reading trashy novels when your towel is a piece of highbrow art.
A classic, and the very first one you should stash in your pool house.
Oddly way cheaper than I would've expected.
...Busy spraying myself with Evian mist.
Rectangular towels are for plebians.
It'll match about a dozen different colors of the brand's polo shirt.
Annnnd cue the announcer's voice from VH1's "The Fabulous Life."
A more luxurious take on the standard "welcome" doormat.
Toss your aluminum watter bottle and Birkenstocks on top.
As a DIY alternative, strategically splash a black towel with bleach.
Even if you never surf, you'll look hardcore while lounging on it.
For girls who decorate their home with reclaimed wood furniture and Mason jar vases.
A Donnie Darko-ish option for the girl who doesn't usually do the whole bright sunlight thing.
Leopard print is the black of fancy designer towels.
Indulge your dandy, europhile self without wearing going topless or dating a Speedo-ed man.
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