1. Never try to predict when a Marc Jacobs show is going to start.
2. The etiquette to getting in and out of a fashion show is akin to that of a soccer match—you can challenge shoulder to shoulder but no elbows or throwing a punch.
3. Everyone looks bored, but few people actually are.
4. The hair will always be longer than the skirts at Versace.
5. Don't wear sunglasses—you'll look like an intern.
6. Don't wear the designer's clothes to the designer's show unless you've been personally invited by Mr. Galliano.
7. Beachy waves are always sexy.
8. Your hair will be shinier if your final rinse is with cold water.
9. Blow-dry side to side rather than (or in addition to) upside down for volume.
10. The biggest mistake people make in the shower is not getting their hair wet enough—without a ton of water, shampoo neither gets in or out of hair well, leaving it duller than dull.
11. Braids are sexy, cute, and the only acceptable form of pigtail.
12. Beauty products make the best presents: They seem incredibly personal, but they're not.
13. An ultra-pale pedicure makes your feet look tanner. Same with silver.
14. A bit of face oil patted on over makeup really revives your whole look.
15. Beyond injections and plastic surgery, retinoids—retinol, Retin-A, et al.—are the most powerful antiaging weapons currently available.
16. Any two shades of lipstick, mixed, are almost always super-flattering.
17. Your favorite highly pigmented lipstick also makes a great sheer cheek stain: Blot on with your fingers, blot again with a tissue, et voilà.
18. Self-tanner makes you look instantly thinner and well-rested.
19. Melted candle wax makes a very fine cuticle cream.
20. Sunscreen doubters should consider the amazing linelessness of their body parts that never see the sun.
21. No beauty product can do for you what eight hours of sleep can.
22. Pale nail polish lasts much longer.
23. If you use face powder, apply it sparingly to your T-zone only.
24. If you're out of scrub (face or body), remember that ancient implement, the washcloth.
25. Always apply powder with a brush. Even compact powder.
26. Thong underwear is not a necessity under most clothing.
27. If your bra is riding up, it's too big (in number, not letter), so swap your 34B for a 32B.
28. Don't buy underwear that needs to be handwashed—inevitably you'll end up putting it in the washing machine and it'll get trashed.
29. Hanky Panky underwear is the only brand that also works when you're pregnant.
30. Your bra straps can show; your underwear straps never should.
31. Shop for boots in August before they sell out.
32. Always have at least one black-tie dress in your closet in case of last-minute celebrating.
33. Go to Zara on Tuesday when the new shipment comes in.
34. Don't shop for clothes when you're tan, thin, or in the Bahamas because everything looks good when you're tan, thin, and in the Bahamas.
35. Every season buy a white cotton Miu Miu top. You'll never regret the splurge.
36. Looking for a dress when you actually need one will rarely lead to a successful find.
37. Buy clothes that you'll wear on a Tuesday afternoon, not a Saturday night—few people lead Saturday-night lives.
38. Don't wear new shoes to a wedding or your first day of work.
39. Black opaque tights make everyone's legs look good.
40. Black tights can look great through open-toe shoes (as long as the tights aren't sheer). Nude tights can never look great. Full stop.
41. The only brands to ever buy blacker-than-opaque tights from: Tabio, Commando, and Wolford.
42. Roll, never fold.
43. Check out the weather report—it gets cold in Cuba and hot in Alaska.
44. Put a change of clothes and a few toiletries in your hand luggage—so your toothbrush (along with the rest of your luggage) doesn't go to Albany while you go to Austria.
45. Never get on an airplane without a cashmere blanket or huge scarf.
46. Bring an extra bag—the kind that rolls up really small—in case you really go shopping on your trip.
47. Pack socks and good snacks in your carry-on.
48. Pouch everything: All your electronics go in one, your toiletries go in another, and so on.
49. Life-changing: Huggable Hangers by Joy Mangano. They'll double your closet space, and wispy little silk things will never fall off again.
50. Avoid being featured on Hoarders by living the "one in, one out" mantra: If you buy something new, take something else out and sell it on eBay or donate it.
51. Color code.
52. Try on your entire wardrobe every six months with an honest friend or mirror nearby.
53. Pack two bags: one for Goodwill and one for the maybes. Give away the first, and revisit the second in six months. It eases you into the breakup.
54. Most useless advice from a salesperson: "You can wear it with jeans."
55. Things that look crappy on a hanger could look gorgeous once you put them on.
56. If something is expensive, leave it behind for 24 hours. If you're still obsessed with it the next day, buy it.
57. Biggest turnoff from a salesperson: "This is our bestselling ______!"
58. If you're feeling lost, trail the chicest woman in the store and check out what she checks out.
59. In-store lighting is not to be trusted. Stand by a window.
60. Black will always be the new black. Anyone who says otherwise is selling something.
61. Mixing navy and black or pink and red can look very chic.
62. You can put almost any prints together as long as they have something in common (color, shape, style).
63. The one remaining style rule to never break: no more than three colors in one outfit.
64. Crazy colors can be basics: We've had to resole our coral patent ballet flats a zillion times while barely wearing our black ones.
65. It's good to have a pair of jeans hemmed for flats and another pair hemmed for heels.
66. Fitted jackets and coats always make you feel skinny, even when you are pregnant.
67. If you have curves and want to wear voluminous clothes, get to know your belts. It's the only way you won't look like a dump truck.
68. Your waist isn't where you think it is. It's about three inches higher. Put another way: the most flattering spot for a waisted dress to hit is just under the rib cage.
69. The stitching at the top of the jeans will never stretch, so size up if it leaves a red mark.
70. Find a good tailor and be very nice to him. He could be your greatest asset.
71. Cigarette pants with flats will always make you look feminine.
72. An off-the-shoulder top should still skim your shoulder.
73. If shoes are only marginally comfortable when you try them on in the store you can be sure they'll be excruciating on the street.
74. Always have two pairs of boots in your closet that aren't scuffed up: tall black ones and flat brown ones.
75. If you invest in a Chanel bag, you will carry it for the rest of your life.
76. By age 30, every woman should own three pairs of comfortable flats, three pairs of walkable heels, and two pairs of total sexpot stilettos.
77. Know how to use your local shoe repair—they can also clean your bags, punch holes in your belts, and dye stuff.
78. The best and most comfortable flats are usually the cheapest.
79. In life you will need four bags: a big, slouchy weekend one; two good-looking but practical work ones; and a sleek evening one. Minimum.
80. Comme des Garçons wallets are so durable and long-lasting, there will actually come a point when you'll want yours to fail so you can buy a new one.
81. Resole your favorite shoes as often as it takes. You will miss them when they die.
82. The Chateau Marmont will always be cool.
83. Kate Somerville is the facialist to the stars for a reason.
84. It's best to go shopping in the morning, when stores are empty.
85. Chris McMillan may be the best hairstylist ever—and doesn't have a three-month waiting list.
86. If you're in L.A., eat at Madeo early—prime time for celebrity sightings.
87. Go to The Ivy for a chopped salad or to see TMZ's paparazzi.
88. Fred Segal.
89. And Abbot Kinney.
90. You have to go to Deyrolle once in your life for a whole new level of taxidermy.
91. When you eat at Brasserie Lipp, be sure you get a table downstairs—upstairs is where they put the tourists.
92. The cheapest, coolest meal is at Café de L'Industrie.
93. Skip the hotels and rent an apartment.
94. Hit Mariage Frères to get gifts for everyone and have an awesome meal that's not horribly expensive.
95. Go to the Ladurée tearoom.
96. When it gets cold, fortify yourself at Angelina's Hot Chocolate.
97. A long-sleeved gown can be completely sexy. The same is not true of a long skirt and long-sleeved top, which can look completely polygamist.
98. A leather jacket looks great with a party dress.
99. Pairing a boyish piece with a girly one will make you look like you know how to dress.
100. When all else fails, a skinny cardigan can pull any look together.