In a word: Tazorac. Go to the dermatologist, endure a few weeks of misbehaving skin, and have clear skin from there on out. In several words, if prescription stuff is too much for you, Acnostat by Pat Wexler, every night, all over your face, even if it is totally blemish-free (which it will be if you are diligent). And—the ultimate cure for an existing breakout, the true miracle product of all time—Umbrian Clay by Fresh (in the tube, not the bar). It clears anything up in two days, tops.

—Jean Godfrey-June, beauty director

FROM: Emily McCarthy, editorial assistant
TO: Beauty Department
SUBJECT: ZIT-ZAPPING TRICK

Traditional acne medication is way too harsh for my very dry skin. I had given up on being able to do anything but wait for my occasional breakouts to clear up on their own. Then it occurred to me: Pimples are caused by bacteria! So on a sheer whim, I applied Neosporin anti-bacterial cream to a patch of recently broken-out skin. And it worked! Really, really well. My skin cleared up overnight.

FROM: Anna Cosby, former beauty department intern
TO: Beauty Department
SUBJECT: FIGHTING OVER FACE WASH

The face wash from the new ZO Skin Health line is amazing! (It's such a huge hit that my roommate keeps stealing it from me when I'm at the beach on the weekends.) It smells really good, keeps me breakout free, and has such a nice texture—thicker and creamier than I'm used to. Amazing!

FROM: Meredith Rollins, executive editor
TO: Beauty Department
SUBJECT: TREATMENT FOR THE OVERZEALOUS

Sometimes I have been overzealous with my acne-assault strategies, and I wake up with my skin burned off. Here's what works to fix it: California Baby Calendula cream. It is pudding-ish and cooling and moisturizing and makes me feel much better. Give me a tub, 'cause I'll use this on everything.

FROM: Meredith Rollins, executive editor
TO: Beauty Department
SUBJECT: MY ANTI-BREAKOUT FORMULA

I am a person who has a clear-skin formula, as I have discussed before. I use my Dermalogica Microfoliant at night and my Glycolix 5-2 pads in the morning. And I throw on a little bit of the extremely powerful and fast-acting Clinique Emergency Gel-Lotion (used sparingly, because this stuff will eat your face off). It works for me, banishing truly decades of acne-related angst and unhappiness. But then I went on vacation, and I ran out of the Glycolix. I had stolen a tube of Neutrogena Oil Free Acne Stress-Control 3-in-1 Hydrating Treatment from the beauty closet, which I kept up at my country shack, so I used that instead. A thin layer, all over my face, after the Microfoliant at night. And it was brilliant. I even think it took a couple of wrinkles away with it. I'm still reordering my Glycolix, but I'm reconsidering my formula ...

I found myself across from another beauty editor on the subway. She didn't notice me (though I smiled and gave her a mini-wave); she was busy with an elaborate makeup ritual: A leather brush roll was spread on her lap, a chic black makeup bag sat on the seat next to her. Peeking through my sunglasses, I watched her transform: Full foundation, concealer, bronzer, a sweep of champagne shadow, liquid eyeliner, and mascara (the last especially impressive considering the jostling train). As we pulled into Times Square, she packed everything up except a little compact of hot pink cream, which she dabbed onto her cheeks and lips—the finishing touch.

She looked gorgeous, and the bright cream was the best part. When I got to my desk, I began a complex Google search to figure out what it was. My best guess: 3 Custom Color watercolor in Pink Hyacinth. The packaging looked the same, and the color was just right so I ordered it immediately.

Its now become my ultimate running-late-makeup-on-the-subway trick: A few pats on my cheeks and lips makes a huge difference—I look awake and alive in three seconds flat. And if I really need mascara, I'll put it on at work where the ground isn't shaking. I haven't yet mastered that unbelievably steady hand.

—Dawn Spinner, associate beauty editor

FROM: Virginia VanZanten, editorial assistant
TO: Beauty Department
SUBJECT: GLEAMING-HAIR SECRET

My sister always has the shiniest blond hair and as the older sibling, I am jealous—not just of the blond, but of the glisten. Her product of choice is Barex Italiana Cristalli Liquidi, and while she usually "borrows" my things, this time I swiped her secret serum—and it worked wonders for my daily blow-dryed/straightened hair. Thanks, Ells!

FROM: Emily McCarthy, editorial assistant
TO: Beauty Department
SUBJECT: BEST MASCARA EVER

I'm obsessed with Tarte's organic mascara! It makes my lashes look incredibly long and stays on all day. But the best part is, it doesn't flake off under my eyes ever. And it's eco-friendly. In my book, that makes it the perfect mascara.

Before Cristina returned from her mono sabbatical, I tidied up her desk a bit. Liquid eyeliner had leaked into her pen jar, foundation had spilled on her keyboard, and a giant pile of packages had collected like a landfill in the corner. I grabbed my packet of Davines JoJo all-over wipes and made it livable again.

When she got into the office later that day, she said, "This place looks great, and it smells good ... like you! Did you spray something?" The perfume, of course, was actually the amazing bubble-bath-and-rice-milk scent of the wipes—so good (and surprisingly long-lasting) that if you disinfect your phone and computer with them, your office will smell clean for days. (They also make an awesome post-workout shower substitute.)

—Dawn Spinner, associate beauty editor

My routine changed a lot, skin-wise, during my disastrous two-month mono stint—namely, I stopped everything. I did not put on moisturizer; I did not put on eye cream. I did not use fruit acid peels or scrub my face with organic exfoliants—I didn't wash my face at all, save when it got wet in the shower (another thing I didn't do much of—leading to the discovery that, indeed, the experts are telling the truth when they say your hair is happier if washed less often).

In the moments I was lucid enough to reflect on what I was doing (i.e., not doing) to my skin, a vague, anticipatory horror would come over me—after similar (less extreme!) periods of neglect, my skin has historically turned into a war zone (dry patches vs. breakouts). But as the weeks went by, my skin remained pretty okay with the new nonroutine—if anything, it seemed to get very slightly better. Weird. Cool.

Here is my hypothesis, and it's 3-pronged: In addition to everything else, I didn't put on makeup, didn't drink caffeine, or alcohol, for a full two months. (I also slept about 15 hours a day, which probably helped too). Granted, it's not the most sustainable beauty routine in the world (believe me, I've already abandoned it), but it's definitely something to think about—I keep trying to remind myself about it when the afternoon Starbucks run comes up.

—Cristina Mueller, senior beauty editor

FROM: Meredith Kahn Rollins, executive editor
TO: Jean Godfrey-June, beauty director
SUBJECT: Summer Red

I want to be one of those people who wears red lipstick, but I am neither cool enough nor meticulous enough (because you kind of have to be a perfectionist to get that '40s-red lip right, no?) to pull it off. Yet I have devised a smudgy red lip that I think works well, and if it's not exactly Joan Crawford-ish, it gets at the look I'm going for with a minimum of fuss. First I sort of dot on Nars Velvet Matte lip pencil in Dragon Girl, and then I layer on Korres lip butter in Wild Rose. It stays put for a long while, and makes me feel infinitely more dressed-up and Hollywood-esque.

FROM: Meredith Kahn Rollins, executive editor
TO: Jean Godfrey-June, beauty director
SUBJECT: Miracle

As I have complained to the beauty department many times, I am one of those people who gets a million mosquito bites the moment I walk out the door. Sunset cocktails are my idea of a perfect hell. But now that I have a baby, I'm less inclined to douse myself with a toxic chemicals in order to keep the bugs away. So when I heard about a perfume from CB called Outside, I made urgent inquiries. It comes in a large, don't-feel-bad-about-spraying-a-lot-of-it bottle, and the scent is really quite nice: botanical, crisp, with a little undercurrent of patchouli—something that is usually way out of my comfort zone (the charms of the Grateful Dead are lost on me), but in this case just gives the whole thing a kind of bohemian, artsy-girl spin. The first time I wore it, everyone told me how great it smelled. And then it happened again. And then, after an extended vacation in the country, I realized that I hadn't gotten one mosquito bite. To say that I'm happy is a vast understatement.

Last night, while working on Flying Crow pose in yoga class, I crashed down on my left knee. The pain traveled up my leg ominously.

By the time I got home, the afflicted knee was swollen and a bruise was forming. I spritzed it with arnica spray and filled the bathtub, pouring in a generous helping of Kneipp juniper bath salts (their "soothing-muscle" formula). I soaked for 20 minutes, and when I got out I slathered on more arnica gel, just to be thorough.

Today ... nothing! Not a mark, not a splotch, and it feels as good as new. I'll be back in Flying Crow tomorrow, if somewhat more cautiously.

—Dawn Spinner, associate beauty editor

My Mueller cousin, Cousin Dave, works in sports marketing in North Carolina. He believes in positive thinking, and sends out-of-the-blue text messages like "just wanna say I love u cuz!," or simply, "BOOM!!". He's famous for his present giving: a homemade hemp necklace, personalized mix tapes ("Cousin's Compilation"), a framed picture of a random Austrian hillside.

Of late, Cousin Dave is a great lover of cologne—which troubles me, because I am not. Most men's fragrances creep me out—too sharp, or too "aquatic" (whatever that means), or too something.

If you have a cousin like Dave—and I hope you do—this is absolutely what you should get him the next time his birthday comes up: Fresh Cannabis Santal. It is warm and complex and a tiny bit spicy, and is universally beloved by men, women, and Sephora executives (it won the "Best of Sephora" award last year). Even me. And of course, Cousin Dave.

—Cristina Mueller, senior beauty editor

Our Cristina has emerged from her epic battle with mono looking ... more fantastic than ever! So. Should you find yourself struck by an illness that causes you to sleep all day for months, take solace in the fact that while you may feel exhausted, you will look stunningly well rested. She looks so good that I'm beginning to suspect that the so-called "New Faced" celebrities are actually on to some extra-sleep-getting secret that is as yet unavailable to mere mortals.

—Jean Godfrey-June, beauty director

C.O. Bigelow Mentha Lip Tint in Coral Mint is more like a sheen than a gloss (your hair won't stick to it) and contains peppermint, so it's cooling and tingly, plus it freshens your breath. I was in a really boring meeting the other day and found myself smelling the tube to stay awake.

—Jennifer Scruby, contributing writer, Miami

A dermatologist accosted me with a chemical peel. I didn't intend to get one, but after an hour long dissertation on how glowing and gorgeous and new-as-a-baby my skin would look, I gave in.

For the next three days, I hid in my apartment as my face peeled off. It wasn't pretty. I slathered on every heavy cream in my bathroom and hoped for the best.

Emerging from hibernation, I was miraculously unscathed except for a new splotch of dark freckles. Fearing further irritation but desperate to get rid of the splotch, I picked up a bottle of Caudalie radiance serum. It's calming, smells innocuously like sweet grapes, and every morning I wake up to a less-visible splotch. Plus, my skin finally has the glow the dermatologist promised—but the credit goes to Caudalie, not the peel.

—Dawn Spinner, associate beauty editor

I have a nosy, terrible habit that I only get away with because I write about beauty for a living: cooing (with Andy Warhol?caliber sycophancy) "Gee, your skin is so beauuutiful..." to people I barely know, then—before they can even thank me—demanding to know exactly what products they use. Let's call it "journalism."

The most recent victim was a luminous beauty-company publicist who shall remain nameless (primarily because the luminosity-inducers aren't her clients). She whispered her regimen—at a cocktail party, no less—for fear of client retaliation: MD Skincare All-In-One Facial Cleanser with Toner, plus the MD Skincare Alpha Beta Daily Face Peel once a week (I also vouch for its excellence), and Tammy Fender Intensive Repair Balm as a moisturizer, which she claims completely transformed her once sun-damaged (and seriously, you'd never know it) face.

If I ever ran into gorgeous you at a party, dear reader, what products would you be unable to help yourself from raving about?

—Cat Marnell, beauty assistant

Just for our blog readers, Wei East—the top beauty brand on HSN—came up with a special coupon code (LUCKY) to give away its amazingly silky, herb-infused Hand and Body Cream. For less than $3 (the cost of shipping), you get a full-size, $14 tube. And it comes with a 25 percent off coupon—so you can try everything else (I love the purifying mask for breakouts) at a discount.

—Dawn Spinner, associate beauty editor

FROM: Michelle Cardone, executive director of creative services and development
TO: Dawn Spinner, associate beauty editor
SUBJECT: Forma Turbo Power flat iron

I love this flat iron! The best part is that you can use it on wet or dry hair. My tip would be to use it on damp hair that's not soaking wet. (I tried it just out of the shower and it made my hair super-hot and straight but not dry.) What I've been doing lately is showering at night and then straightening in the morning when my hair is damp. I can't even tell you how many people have been complimenting me!

One of the first places my husband G. and I lived (after marrying at age 3) was a town called Ypsilanti, in Michigan. We lived in a condo on Ford Lake—so named because of the large Ford factory on the other side of the lake. People fished in the lake; the only thing they ever caught were carp, and the carp, were, perhaps unsurprisingly, deformed in a never ending parade of varieties.

For our first anniversary, we blew up a rubber raft and set sail onto Ford Lake with the bottle of $7 Freixenet we had carefully saved from our wedding (I thought the black bottles were the height of chic). As the sun set, we opened the champagne—to find it had gone flat. But the day was saved by a two-headed carp who bobbed up to the surface, distracting us from the deflated symbol of our happy union.

The newest pedicure technician on the block, it turns out, is a carp. Teams of carp, actually, that nibble on spagoers' toes, perfecting and polishing like so many munchkins in the Emerald City. (Yvonne Hair and Nail in Alexendria, Virginia, is actually where the treatment takes place.)

One of the many side effects of our energy crisis is that corn has become expensive, and corn, as Michael Pollan will tell you, is, ridiculously the foundation of practically every food we eat. Hence, catfish farmers are going bankrupt by the bucketful, because they can't afford the corn to feed the fish. Carp and catfish, six of one, half dozen of the other, no?

I sense a business opportunity here. Further, I think an ultra-exclusive pedicure-and-dinner Nobu kind of experience involving pirahnas and blowfish could be developed.

—Jean Godfrey-June, beauty director