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Jeremy Scott
For when your Céline furkenstocks feel too subtle.
Vivienne Westwood
What Bozo will buy his wife for Christmas.
These should come with a warning label: no soccer, maxi skirts or sitting cross-legged.
She's got eyes on the back of her...feet?
Saint Laurent
The fanciest magpie nest ever.
Dolce & Gabbana
Aw, no bird?
Alexander Wang
Flashdance mule-wedges. Amaze.
Tsumori Chisato
Looks like the oyster's there, too.
Something to wear with your new Chanel fur helmut!
Alexander McQueen
Good for street style, editorial spreads and, uh, dueling.